Oh the torture of Summer, 2014!
Day 1
Dear Diary,
Today I got into a political argument, a religious argument, and a generalized disagreement on Facebook. I needed to win the arguments so I argued with half-facts, specious logic and emotionally charged language in an effort to make others on Facebook come over to my point of view. When that didn’t work, I hid a few messages posted by people who disagree in order to keep readers from seeing a dissenting opinion. I think I won the argument. I hope no one digs up the facts and exposes my methods! Smooch. Goodnight.
Day2
Dear Diary,
Outrage! Today I learned that Facebook has been manipulating me! Those fiends! Those villains! It’s something to do with algorithms and making me happy or sad. I looked up the word “algorithm” and still don’t know what it means, but I think they have been controlling what I see in my news feed. Then I found out that there was one of these dastardly algorithms controlling my newsfeed even before my social network nemisis manipulated me! Such manipulators! Harumph! Goodnight.
Day 3
Dear Diary,
Today I spent most of my day posting indignant status messages about Facebook and their manipulative ways. I shouted down a few people who disagreed, and reported their posts as offensive. My newsfeed doesn’t seem to be manipulated today, but I’m suspicious of anything I read on Facebook now. I’m beginning to believe that some of it isn’t true. Goodnight!! That is all.
Day 4
Dear Diary,
I found out today that Facebook is a BUSINESS! Apparently, the entire purpose of this massive techno conspiracy is to learn more about me, learn about my relationships, study my preferences and observe my behavior so that this BUSINESS can make money by allowing other Businesses to use that information to their advantage. Please tell me, I beg of you that Facebook is the free, not-for-profit, cool-dude place to hang out I thought it was and not some grand scheme to sell me things! Weepingly. Goodnight.
Day 5
Dear Diary,
Algorithms! I think they rule the world. I still don’t know what they are, but they manipulate me in every way possible! Oh, those algorithms! If I ever meet one, oh boy, is that algorithm going to pay! I hate algorithms. I’m going to Occupy Algorithms. You just wait and see what happens to algorithms that manipulate me! Determinedly. Goodnight.
Day 6
Dear Diary,
Tim Howard Rules! I can’t wait to think of a really cool status to post about him! I think the loss had something to do with algorithms. Euphoric, but a little sad. Goodnight.